Raise your hand if you have trust issues? Thank you, you may put your hands down now. I feel like I’m in very good company. Trust is an elusive character. From a young age we learn if you trust others they won’t come through for you; or if it is ourselves we look to for trust, we second guess constantly because the evidence has shown us we can’t trust our intuition or soul. It’s let us down in the past so why should we believe it now?
I’ve had a very real test with trust during my breast cancer journey. As an RN I want to know everything about my breast cancer. The tests, the results, the pathology reports, the mammogram and MRI results, treatment options, and as an ICU RN I want them NOW. Then I realized I was driving myself crazy. I was trying to live in the world of what-ifs and control. This behavior was not helping me to stay with what I knew for sure. There were always more questions. With the realization that my craziness wasn’t helping, I calmed down and I started to trust. I started to let go of the need to know everything and control, and started to trust I would be OK. The shock passed with my diagnosis, I knew I would be OK. Trusting was the right path to tread. Allowing myself to listen closely to my intuition revealed the evidence that it has been the right every step of the way.
Trust brought me to a place of peace 90-95% of the time and being human that ain’t bad. If there was one thing you could do to start trusting your fate to the universe or God, what would that be? Join me in that peaceful garden of trust and know that you’ll always be OK.